All Scripture quotations are taken from the New American Standard Bible 1995 Ed. (NASB95), published by The Lockman Foundation

One of the most controversial topics in western Christian circles is the relationship between authoritative leaders and subordinates. Our egalitarian culture, which seeks to get rid of all major reasons for treating groups of people differently than others, has so infected Christian mindsets that the legitimacy of hierarchies has even been called into question. One example of this is the unbalanced emphasis on a servile leadership, often termed “servant leadership.” Some definitions of this remove all authority to issue commands from biblical leaders.

In contrast to the unreasonable and unbiblical idea of egalitarianism, the apostles present us with a clear structure of leadership roles that have the authority to give orders requiring obedience from subordinates. Most of the New Testament letters, and the rest of Scripture, present us with a clear concept of a hierarchical structure in the family and in society. Subordinates, or what I’ll call followers, are expected to obey their superior leaders, since these leaders have been vested by God with command authority. On the other hand, leaders are given the tremendous responsibility of caring for, providing for, and protecting, those under their authority, even through the use of clear commands and instructions.

One of the most concise summaries of the Christian duties of leaders and followers is written by Paul in his letter to the Colossians. In this section at the end of chapter 3, and beginning of chapter 4, he provides a clear set of responsibilities for the most important positions in families and in businesses during the 1st century. He begins by describing the requirements for marriages, then for child-parent relationships, and finally for the very common relationship between slaves and their masters. By looking at this passage, we’ll learn the basic expectations for each role in these partnerships, and see that submission, obedience, and loving authority are essential for their mutually beneficial functioning.

In brief, here are the instructions Paul issues on behalf of the Lord Jesus:

  1. Wives Submit to Husbands (v. 18)
  2. Husbands Serve their Wives (v. 19)
  3. Children Obey their Parents (v. 20)
  4. Fathers Ease their Children (v. 21)
  5. Slaves Obey Their Masters (vss. 22-25)
  6. Masters Serve Their Slaves (4:1)

This is what Paul’s Spirit-inspired letter says:

“Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be embittered against them. Children, be obedient to your parents in all things, for this is well-pleasing to the Lord. Fathers, do not exasperate your children, so that they will not lose heart. Slaves, in all things obey those who are your masters on earth, not with external service, as those who merely please men, but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord. Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance. It is the Lord Christ whom you serve. For he who does wrong will receive the consequences of the wrong which he has done, and that without partiality. Masters, grant to your slaves justice and fairness, knowing that you too have a Master in heaven.” – Colossians 3:18-4:1

For logical discussion of this passage, we’ll start by grouping the instructions for wives and husbands together, then those for children and fathers, and finally those for slaves and masters. This way, we’ll be able to look at the mutually beneficial way that their responsibilities affect the other role. So let’s first go to the main duties of marriage partners.

Wives Submit and Husbands Sacrifice

In the first two verses, Paul pictures the ideal Christian marriage in simple terms by calling upon wives to submit to their husbands, and the husbands to love their wives. By “submit,” or “be subject to,” he’s literally conveying the meaning of “placing oneself under,” or “yielding to one with authority,” and this implies the willingness to obey commands. The Greek word he uses is the same one used in Ephesians 5, where he compares the marriage relationship to the relationship that the “church,” or literally “Assembly,” has with Christ. Thus, in Eph. 5:24, Paul tells wives that “as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives . . . to their husbands in everything.” This is why he tells wives that submitting to their husbands is “fitting in the Lord” (v. 18). In other words, because they are “in” the Lord, and spiritually united to Him, they must submit to the authority that he’s placed over them.

On the other hand, Paul calls husbands to something far more challenging and demanding. As opposed to simply letting another person direct their behavior through submission, he calls husbands to “love” their wives. The fact that he has to command them to love their wives tells us that this love is a more demanding type of love than is usually required of a Christian. We know from Ephesians 5 that the love he’s demanding of husbands is the same type of love that Jesus has for His whole people, the Assembly. Hence, he’s calling husbands to give up certain rights, comforts, and conveniences to meet the needs of their wives, and to care for their souls. Put simply, husbands are expected to represent Jesus’s authority, love, goodness, kindness, and protection to their wives. Therefore, Paul warns them to avoid being “embittered against them” (v. 19). This is uncharacteristic of Jesus, inappropriate, selfish, but all too tempting to most husbands. However, husbands are called to be compassionate, kind, gentle, and patient, rather than angry or frustrated.

If both roles in this relationship are following these directions, then the marriage will be supremely blessed, harmonious, and Christ-glorifying. Wives should submit to and obey their husbands as representing Jesus, and husbands must lay down their lives for their wives, and love them as they love their own bodies. Next comes the responsibilities of their offspring to their parents, and vice versa.

Children Obey and Fathers Encourage

Paul’s next concern is with the way children treat their parents, and how fathers treat their children. As he called wives to submit to their husbands, so he now does for children to their parents. Obviously, this submission is that of an immature, usually less intelligent, and dependent person to someone who is the opposite of these things. The children Paul has in mind are those who are being provided for by their parents, so they have a more extensive scope of things to obey in. That’s why he commands them to obey their parents “in all things,” not just some things (v. 20). It doesn’t matter what area of life about which their parents command them to do something, they must follow it (with the condition that it’s not sinful). And why should they obey their parents? Because it’s “well-pleasing to the Lord” (v. 20). Actually, the Greek Paul used here was that it’s pleasing in the Lord. Again, he’s basing the children’s obedience to their parents on their submissive and united relationship to the Lord Jesus.

As for fathers, which can also be applied to mothers, they are given a prohibition. Paul is specifically addressing “fathers” because they have the main responsibility of caring for their children, as the head of their household. They must avoid “exasperating” their children, to prevent them from “losing heart” (v. 21). This will obviously require much patience, kindness, and gentleness on their part. Along those lines, Paul seems to be implying that fathers must avoid being overbearing, harsh, or totalitarian. The opposite of this would be to encourage their children. This is exactly the kind of discretion that he enjoins on slave-masters in the next section, which is dominated by detailed expectations for slaves.

Slaves Obey and Work for Christ and Masters Love Them

In the last few verses of Colossians chapter 3, and the beginning of chapter 4, Paul outlines very specific instructions for slaves, and then a short command for masters. It would make sense that he wanted to thoroughly reason with slaves to fulfill their duties faithfully, since they were in a seemingly uncomfortable and tempting position. As slaves, they actually belonged to another man as their property, and were obligated to do what their masters told them. However, they also understood that as children of God, they were now heavenly citizens who ultimately belonged to Jesus, and would one day be free from the ownership of any sinful human being. Thus, they likely were tempted to think that they should be free from their obligation of obedience to their master, since they were eternally and spiritually free from enslavement. Paul reminds them that their free and exalted position as Christians doesn’t free them from their earthly obligation as slaves to another man. On the contrary, they should be the best slaves in their society.

Why is this? Evidently, Paul is implying in this passage that although slavery isn’t an ideal human relationship, yet God has ordained it as a form of human structure and government, and has given masters the authority to command and care for their slaves. Paul is clearly putting slavery in a similar category as marriage and the childhood relationship between children and parents. Masters have God-given authority, since God has chosen to use a troublesome system (such as civil government can be) to accomplish His purposes of human government in society.

What’s the proof of this? First, Paul commands slaves to obey their earthly masters by being motivated by “fearing the Lord” (v. 22). In other words, they are to obey because the Lord expects them to. Further, the work they do for their masters is to be done “as for the Lord rather than for men” (v. 23). That is, they are to obey their master as if they are obeying Jesus, showing that their master is functioning as a representative of Jesus. Thirdly, if they obey and do their work as if they’re working for the Lord, they’ll “receive the reward of the inheritance” (v. 24). Why? Because ultimately they’re not serving their master, but “the Lord Christ whom you serve” (v. 24). Again, this implies that their human masters are serving in the place of Jesus, so that when they serve them they’re serving Jesus. In addition to these features of slavery, Paul concludes his argument to slaves by warning them that if they do “wrong” in their slavery, then they’ll “receive the consequences of the wrong which he has done, and that without partiality” (v. 25). Hence, slaves have no excuse for rebelling against their masters’ authority based on a perception of injustice with regard to their position.

It should be noted that in all that Paul says to slaves, he’s obviously assuming that they’re not just property, but full and proper human beings. That is, although slavery isn’t an ideal institution, yet it could in those days be used to serve useful and dignified purposes. Since Christian slaves knew that they had the same value to God as any other person, they could therefore serve within that system thankfully and joyfully, and use their service of their masters as a testimony to the truth of the gospel. Their mission wasn’t to directly annihilate slavery, but to use it as a means of showing forth the grace of God in the gospel.

With that said, it will come as a perplexing surprise to most believers with a western mindset that Paul gives instructions to Christian slave-owners too, but says nothing about releasing slaves from their enslavement. Apparently again, the role of slave-masters served a useful purpose in God’s work of spreading the gospel and His kingdom. One possible reason that the New Testament nowhere calls for the abandonment of slavery is that it was so fundamental to society in the Roman Empire. Most of its population were slaves, and slavery was so common that no one called it into question. Slaves performed a huge bulk of the labor and business in the Empire, and did so even to their financial well-being, and eventual purchase of freedom. That’s why 1st century Roman slavery is a fitting parallel to our current western employment structure, besides the component of ownership. Nevertheless, when you agree to perform services for an employer, are you not basically voluntarily enslaving yourself to that employer, at least for a time? Hence, the instructions for slaves and masters are indirectly applicable to employees and employers.

But to finish with the consideration of the masters’ instructions, they’re supremely simple and plain. All Paul tells these Christian masters is that they must be just and fair toward their slaves, since they possess their own heavenly Master, Jesus. Although slavery was so common, and used so effectively to run the Roman economy, slaves were usually viewed as less valuable than freemen. Hence, it was common for masters to treat their slaves unjustly and unfairly, or unequally. To treat your slaves with justice and fairness was to recognize their equal value in God’s sight, and their full humanity. This would have shown watching unbelievers that these masters had a different esteem of humanity than many others, and that their God was an impartial and loving God.

The Importance of Submission and Loving Authority

Since this passage is so clear, I don’t need to add much in the way of application. However, to review with you what this passage emphasizes, it’s the essential nature of submission to authority, and the loving exercise of authority. The Lord explains the proper functioning of two of the main hierarchical systems in earthly human society here – the family and enslavement. As believers in the Lord Jesus, we must honor and defend the possible value of both these systems as they exist in their fundamental, and Christian, forms.

The relationship between wives and husbands must be conducted as befits the picture of believers and Jesus that it displays, with wives being the followers, and husbands being the heads. Second, the relationship between children and fathers should reflect that which believers have with their heavenly Father. And finally, the relationship between employees and employers should reflect that which believers have with the Lord as His servants and slaves. If we simply recognize that the hierarchies and governments that naturally exist are established by God, and honor our position in those hierarchies, then we’ll display God’s glory by showing that He’s a wise, just, and loving Ruler of humanity, and has established His Son to be the supreme Ruler over all people. So, recognize your subordination or authority in the God-ordained structures, and faithfully and joyfully fulfill your role as the Lord’s servant.